letter to Ashaz

To Ashaz,

Ashaz, it is heavily raining here and i feel like you have visited this city. Rain has always reminded me of you. This city is haunting me  because it's too peaceful without you. Ashaz you told me that your name means, " one in million " and now it upsets me since you've gone because i feel i can't ever find someone like you because there's noone like you. 

I was passing by this flowershop yesterday and it reminded me of you. You have left the city but left behind the reminders to keep reminding me of you. Ashaz your name is the sweetest melody ever my voice has sung. Before your name, i have always hated my voice. 

Ashaz, i told you, i'm leaving this city tomorrow but it feels like i'll be carrying you with me. This life is so short, when we were together, time slipped by us and now that we are far, i don't know what to do, time is still slipping by and looks like my life will be over soon and perhaps i won't be able to see you for the last time. I dont know where to send this letter because i dont know which city is your home now. Ashaz, the world is so big, and i feel lost here, i feel so helpless tonight because i dont where you are, because i dont know how you are and i dont know what you do when you miss me.

Ashaz tumhe sochti hu toh sirf adhera dikhai deta hai, ek aujhal sa hota chehra ho tum,  tumhe sochti hu toh kho jati hu, tumhe yaad karti hu toh ro padti hu. Ashaz mujhse aksar chand, sitare, baarish, tumhari gali, tumhara purana ghar, tumhari kitabe, tumhare likhi chhithiya, aur dukano mai bikti chai aur maska pau mujhe aaj bhi sirf tumhari yaad dilati hai. 

Ashaz tumne shehar chord diya magar shehar ne tumhe aaj bhi apne kareeb rakha hai. Ashaz mai aksar tumhe dhoondhne nikal jati hu, mano jaise tum mujhe kahi kisi raste pe mera intezar karte mil jaogye, magar mai aksar haar kar, ghar laut aati hu aur phir tumhe bas apne dil mai pati hu. Tum jaha kahi bhi ho, tum aaj bhi mere pas ho. 
Sab khariyat? Kaise ho?


Comments

  1. Anonymous11 July 2023 at 22:06

    Ashaz is so lucky to have you. You will keep him inmortal in your writings. I am not crying but i am

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

september

Image
Somedays i am scrolling through my feed and see your name, sometimes i am passing down the lanes and hear your name, some nights i am struggling with sleep and listening to songs in your playlist . This world is nothing more than the amalgamation of people of different kinds, different faces, different blood groups, but having similar names as yours.  My heart has always been a darkhole of feelings it couldn't confess and for long i have held onto words, emotions and feelings until it started to feel like a loop around my neck. I feel to be able to speak how you feel is still an art, and only some writers have got this. The rest like me are all sobbing in a corner of this world writing down these pages that we'll never accept it to be more than a mere fiction if ever get caught.  The world is a playground my love, with numerous small segregations stated as different countries and these countries have further divisions into cities and in between all these partitions, we are just
Read more

growing up, adulthood

Image
Wherever i am right now, it's so peaceful here. My head is in a calm place and i can really feel my breaths. When i sleep, i no longer count on sheeps, i fall in my bed, and i open my eyes the next morning.  As you grow up, you get tired of drama.  Then, you just want genuine things, honest people and bright moments. As i grew up, i just wanted real people, people who would choose me again and again. I didn't want to get into a cat fight over a guy, i didn't want to lose my sleep over someone all night, i didn't want to argue over something where i just wished to be understood, i didn't want to seek validation, i didn't want to hide, i didn't want to complain, i didn't want to wait for someone who perhaps may never come back, i didn't want to beg someone to stay, i didn't want to write letters to someone i love because i was petrified of them using it against me, i didn't want to trust someone blindly, i didn't want to take confessions s
Read more